thank you Lisa xx

Great post....

This year has sure been one of reflections to cut the dead wood - so the best relationships can bloom or new ones manifest. Being true to ones own inner voice is a great thing to do. Be in you own Power.

Hi Lisa,
People often change over time, and they can change in ways that aren't compatible with us. We can either put up with it and grit our teeth and be miserable; or liberate ourselves and find happiness. It takes courage to make the change; and I greatly admire those who are strong enough to do it. Life is precious and we should live it in a way that makes it as happy for everyone as possible.
Be well and make life beautiful!
Love and hugs,
Cheryl

Well said. So true. Much needed. :o)

ALOT of people are going through major life changes. l am at that part of the cycle when you question friendships,relationships,your values. Honesty is the key. Be honest with the people in your life and be honest with yourself. At the time these changes may be very hard but in the end it's worth it because you are living your truth.Love to everyone and have a fab Xmas,RACCA xoxox

So True Lisa But Can Be So Hard To Do!

Facing the hard truth head on in given situations / relationship can end up taking a couple to the eye-of-the storm yet strengthening and maturing a love beyond expectation. The Friendship or Relationship will never be the same, but change is the glue of lasting bonds. If we don't change we don't move forward. Its like a heart that stops in between beats and does not start again. The entire body reaches the triad of death and one by one the core body functions stop. It is so like friendships that fall a part.

Sometimes we love an individual because they fill a need or empty place inside of us that we are self are responsible for. Then, there are those we just can't help but love because they are just so lovable, and all the pieces are there falling into place like a beautiful puzzle. The more pieces we put together the more we learn about each other. We should never expect anyone to change by our tastes yet realize we all change. As relationships grow, we also grow individually and communication becomes the key. To continue to fit together like a pieces of a puzzle, continuing to grow together and "fit" one must take responsibility for their own feelings, their own actions, promises, expectations and path and never take each other for granted.

No matter how the relationship turns out we grow, we learn and we become better people if we choose to. And there are those moments when we realize what is important and what is not. As we move on to other relationships looking back I remember what the deal breakers are for me and take note of those red flags so that I know not to go forward only to take 5 steps backwards.

I really believe forgiveness is the key to inner wellbeing.
People are made to make mistakes and for true personal progression we need learn from them.
I believe the key is to tell them how their transgression has affected you. You may need to take the path that leads away from them for a while, but they will always be with you in a sense.
Life is about learning, its a free miracle every day. Don't get bogged down in negative thought, live every today as though it is the first and last.

Lisa, I wish you and Charlie a Merry Christmas and a very happy new year! I hope you find a bit of peace and I've been thinking/worried about you. I really don't know you but I can feel your energy. Sending good vibes for you, hang in there honey, time heals! Bren

Thank you LIsa....I needed to hear this.

Thank you my friend for the blog. How true . We have to trust and believe in ourselves before we can believe and trust someone else. I really know where you are coming from or should I say where you are going to with all of this. I do worry about you my love, but I also know you are a very strong person and will get through this. My love to Charlie , your mum and dad and especially to you my love. Do have a great Christmas and happy New Year.

Love ya lots,
Mary

thanks, Lisa. I wish it were that easy to apply these principles to our daily lives.....

peace....deb t/illinois

Thank you Lisa for this blog. I really agree with you. It's not easy because indeed people change through time and even when we realise we may not have much in common anymore with a person, we tend to be faithful to what we have lived. Sometimes it's possible, sometimes it's not. And letting go it away is sometimes painful.
I hope you enjoy moments with your parents,

Have lovely holidays dear Lisa !

Lise

On the other hand, to play "devil's advocate," I do have to say that I think our society has "trained" us to expect things to come too easily.

Relationships take work. No one seems to want to hear that nowadays, but it's true. They take forgiveness and compromise and work!

My husband and I just celebrated our 33rd wedding anniversary. I haven't always been easy to live with. He hasn't always been easy to live with. But we didn't give up when things got hard or when trust was shaky. We've had some hard things in our life (and some of it occurred while I was going through menopause, which made things even worse!). But we have committed to not giving up.

Cut the deadwood? Yes, sometimes it's desirable or even necessary. But sometimes a relationship is worth the work. And the sense of accomplishment when you do work through the hard times is wonderful! :-)

Ah the End of the Year musings can be bittersweet. I agree completely with you, Lisa. Too much time is wasted when we dance around issues and overlook or deny things. At least I have found it to be so in my life.

I look back on this year with a little frustration for things not achieved, but a whole lot of love and happiness for things that did happen. And both categories (achieved/not achieved) are good and fair and appropriate and I embrace them all. Because it's My Life.

And what a year for you! So much for you in this past year! So much growth and change! And that's only what I, on the outside, have seen! Ha!

I'm feeling all Big Sisterly here and encourage you to wrap up tight with your inner household the last few days of the year and just BE. Embrace all the changes, and I know you are.

I want to thank you, Lisa, for the past year.Your work means a great deal to me and has helped me figure a number of things out. You arrived at the perfect time for me: other things were settling in to place 'just so' and then I turn on the telly in 2007 or whenever it was, and there was this crazy haired Brit reading for people. And you were the cherry on the cake to all that other stuff going on in my life. The door was opening for me and you kicked it all the way. Little could I imagine then all that would happen, and how your work would start to change and heal people, and how you would encourage and help me personally. Bless you.

Have the most wonderful Solstice and Christmas, and see you in the New Year at some point I am sure. Probably May in San Diego.

Too True.

Dear Lisa, you are lucky if you do not like something and if it does not make you happy, you are able to walk away from it. I have been in a marriage which is a non-marriage for 5 1/2 years. But I cannot and never can allow myself to think about walking away from it. Conditioned like that from the time I was a child.

So I spend nights unable to sleep, wondering what it is like to have a boyfriend, what is it like to fall in love, what is it like to be madly in love, what is it like to have babies. But I will never know. For Babies, there is the Doctor's office for trying all sorts of procedures.

Why did this happen? Because I gave away my power of choice to a parental figure to please the parental figure. I never chose what I wanted. A husband should not function as a housemate or a friend. A husband should be a lover.
The husband I have is wonderful in every way except in the role of a husband.

I have had a reading with a psychic last year and one this year. They all keep saying one similar line. That line is 'You are trapped'. 'You are trapped'.

If anyone of you tried to live my life for one day, you will feel a sort of pain so intense that you will never want anyone to feel pain like that.

But I learnt something beautiful from this extended family. That is to accept the cards that fate has dealt you with grace and dignity. I am trying and failing and trying and failing. Failing more than trying. But I will learn to smile again tomorrow.

Lisa Dear, I admire you heaps because when in a difficult situation you often choose to be postive over being negative. You truly deserve a pat on your shoulder, a huge hug and a warm mug of hot chocolate. ((((((Hugs))))))

I feel so much anger at my situation buried inside me. I have to find a way to deal with it. Maybe in the end, I am angry with myself. But don't let this bring you down in any way. Have a good day. :-)

Such a great blog.... as always !!! So true :) I agree come end of year it's something that really does make us look at our past year and really think twice about who we want to carry into the New Year and who we need to let go of.
And it's a hard choice either way cause as friends, it's hard to let go of what you once had or the good memories. I always think that somewhere in this person , is the person I once liked and had the qualities I once was attracted to ..... yet theres that other side to them that you see that makes you want to distance yourself from them cause it outweighs the good. We cant change others but we can work on changing ourselves and believing in ourselves.
I totally love your blogs girl, they are such an eye opener and an inspiration, you seem to touch so many people at just the right time.
Love and hugs to you and Charlie
Atmos

Hi Lisa,

Being ourselves at peace is what it counts the most and life is a serial making decisions about it..

;0)

Friendly yours from the East (and not snowing yet..) Coast.

thank you. it's fitting for me at this time.

This blog is so spot on!

Somehow we all get stuck and caught in a web of disappointments for one reason or another. I know that I disappointed so many in my life and not from lack of love but because they want to change me into what they want me to be. When one needs to possess or change another, whether it be their own insecurity or distrust, this is not unconditional love. No matter what happens in life, no one should have to compromise who they truly are as an individual. I am who I am and make no apologies for it as I am a person of love and light whenever possible. If someone does not like me for me I say 'don't let the door slam you in the ass on your way out'. This may sound harsh and obnoxious but I used to live by this and I am getting that old fire back. You are so right Lisa, you just can't please everyone and as long as we are living our lives on purpose, the rest is just noise. The soul knows what we need, but it is up to us to listen.

Love~n~Light always,
DS

Thank you Lisa, I am pritty new to your exstanded family, but this post has hit home in thing that i had gone though my self in the past few year. but for me it hard to pick my self up, the person i was in a relashionship with was also my best friend. we had started out as friends first, then we fail in love. then she broke up with me 16 yr later for some one els. it been a long 4 yr becouse i have to work with her.
lisa thank you, and have a Merry Christmas.

Wishing u a gentle peaceful loving healthy Christmas and New Year! God bless (((Lisa)))

When in a relatonship it is very important to remember that you each have your own
energy. Too often we try to colide our energies together as one. Be yourself and your own energy...just communicate to the other person what your feelings are. Communicate what is changing about you or what you simply do not like or what does not make you happy...also remember you must come to know who you are and what you expect before you can do this... If they are right for you then they will get it. If they get it or try to understand through love then I say yes they are a keeper. Ahhh but does it not seem so much more complicated than that. LOL Relationships take work but you should not be exausted every day!